Never before have I come face-to-face with the hopelessness of a life without Christ. No matter what happens, no matter what comes my way, I have always known that I could turn to my Savior, cast my worries at His feet, and live with confidence in His grace. We become so complacent there, losing the awe having of a personal relationship with God among the daily trappings of life, not realizing the treasure we have in Christ. If we truly saw the gospel of grace as a treasure, wouldn't we be more quick to share it?
A student at the school who I led at orientation and helped throughout the semester committed suicide last week. When I heard the news and let it sink it, I slowly became sick as the emotion overwhelmed me. When the tears started, I immediately opened my mouth to pray and then realized, what could I pray for? Ricky took his life, and is gone. I could pray for comfort for his father. I could pray that his brother doesn’t make the same choice. I could pray that somehow lives could be saved out of the tragic situation. But helplessness and hopelessness soon enveloped me when I realized – I couldn’t pray for Ricky. He made his choice, and his destiny is now set in stone. Never before have I found myself in a situation where I couldn’t turn the situation to God, because Ricky had already made a choice and sealed his fate.
The hopelessness that I felt when I realized there was nothing anyone could do for Ricky is what nonbelievers live with every day. What incredible emptiness it must be to face life’s trials and not be able to rest in the grace and mercy of a Savior! I can only imagine how this hopelessness surrounded Ricky as he gave up on his life.
Hearing of his choice, I became overwhelmed with guilt for not sharing the gospel with Ricky in the time that I had with him. Our purpose as Christians is to glorify God with our lives, sharing the hope of the gospel with those around us. How tragic to get caught up in the daily trappings of this life to the point that we forget by whose grace we are here!
When they say that death haunts you with questions of “what if”, that is an understatement. What if I had slowed down enough to see beyond the sadness in Ricky’s eyes to minister to him, and share the treasure of the gospel that I have been given?
I pray that we all learn to value the grace found in the blood of Jesus, not as a ticket out of Hell, but as a treasure to be passed on to those who are hurting around us.
Lord, let me never ignore an opportunity to share Your love.